In the Midst of the Sea

Talking to God in the midst of the sea:

Recently I experienced a great hurt. I couldn’t feel anything except a deep betrayal that brought with it pain and anguish. I was so hurt I began to feel sick. So I went to the beach to talk to God. I know I can talk to God anytime, anywhere, and I do, but the beach holds special significance to me and in my relationship with God. It was around 8:30 pm and it was already dark out. It was low tide so the water was way out there and I was able to walk on the sand in the midst of the sea.

With tears streaming down my face I looked up towards the Heavens and started talking to Him. I told Him my hurt. I paced the sand questioning why. Eventually I had no more words just my tears. In that moment a thought came to me. The God that holds the Heavens, the God that created all things, holds the whole world in His hands, and yet in that very same moment He saw me. He sees me. In the middle of the ocean at that particular time He saw my grief and my anguish and He was there. Not only does He see me but He loves me.

To this day I find it hard to completely comprehend the depth and height of His love for me but I am so grateful for that moment with the Lord. I am so grateful that I was able to feel His presence in the midst of my hurt and to feel cherished and loved. I mentioned this to a special lady from church and she encouraged me to treasure this moment. To look back and remember it when I feel alone and abandoned. I am not alone. I am treasured and I am loved immeasurably by the same God who created the Heavens and the Earth. It really is not so simple to digest but I am working on it. The greatest thing is, the same God who did all of that, who spoke to me in the middle of the sea? He is the very same God who feels the same about YOU. He sees you. He KNOWS you. And He loves you. I pray you would be comforted tonight. I was not going to share this publicly but I feel like maybe there is someone who needs to hear this. Maybe there is someone who doesn’t know the love of Christ. Maybe someone is dealing with betrayal and hurt. Jesus sees your hurt. He hears your cry. He is right there with you. In the midst of the pain, in the midst of the sea. Hallelujah.

I pray we would comprehend just how vast His love for us is and that we would live and walk in His love and grace.

Sally, the best Bear there ever was.

 

Today is the day my faithful companion, Sally Bear, died. She was our dog for a really long time. To be honest I can’t remember how long we have had her. She’s just always been there, and I’m incredibly sad. She’s had a great life though; she lived a long time. She’s had two litters, and she’s been there for the birth of around ten nieces and nephews. We’ve had other dogs, but Sally stands out because she was the greatest. She was my backseat driver, shotgun rider, my pillow, comforter, an amazing listener, avid fisher, she loved taking long walks on the beach, and was always up for going for walks in the neighborhood. She wasn’t the friendliest to strangers, but she was a great protector. She loved chasing field mice and howling at the moon, and more than anything, she was my best friend.

High school was a dreadful time for me. If we’re going to be completely honest, elementary school wasn’t a walk in the park either. I was bullied and in high school I didn’t have any self-confidence. In one year, I attended three different schools. It was a rough period. Two of my sisters got married in one year, and much drama ensued. I was caught in the middle. My best friend moved across the country. I was depressed. Life just wasn’t smooth sailing, you know? But Sally? She was my constant. They say that the only constant in life is change. I see that now, but for more than a decade, Sally was my constant. Through all the changes, through all the drama, she was there for me. She saw me mature from a gangly eleven year old to who I am now.

A while ago, approximately a year ago, Sally was dying. She had given birth to her last litter, and there were complications. We gave her medicine but the outlook was very bleak. I believe in the power of prayer and I don’t care what anyone says, I know God listens to prayer. Even for animals. Because Sally was dying, there was no denying that. I remember crying my heart out to God, pleading for Him to heal her. I would pass by the dog house and spend time with her before leaving for school or work, praying for her, touching her, comforting her. And you know what?  She bounced back, albeit slowly, but she was no longer at death’s door. I knew death was inevitable, but I am just so thankful that God gave her to us for a little while longer. She got to meet new members of our family, live out the rest of her days in a nicer place, and we got to spend some more quality time together. God is just amazing. I am so grateful to Him and for the fact that He listens to our prayers. No one is ever going to convince me otherwise. No matter how trivial the prayer might be, no matter if it’s not for a human being, God listens to and answers our prayers. I testify to that.

This post is dedicated to Sally, and to other animal owners who have had their best friends pass away. Not everyone understands the pain, but it’s very real, and it’s nothing to scoff at. I will always remember her and cherish her memory. This one’s for you Sally Bear. I love you.